Life and Death Archives - AFS Publishing

Life and Death

23.19 Legacy Files

Marshall McLuhan famously said ‘the medium is the message’ (by which was meant that the choice of means and transmission of the message was more impactful than the message itself) but this could also be restated as ‘the medium is the legacy’. If the creator hasn’t provided for the means to preserve their work, and retrieve it, it vanishes, and the longed-for legacy is lost. Hoping to be remembered is a mug’s game really, since in actuality the means to preserve and retrieve records is fragile and likely temporary.

2023-10-15

Life and Death

23.14 MAiD

I’ve had experience with medical assistance in dying, with my dogs. Scoff if you like, but I’m sure the rituals and emotional experience of it is very similar. And the worst of it is, the trusting quadrupedal family member has no idea what is coming. For our pets, and severely injured and ill animals of any description, we have almost no reservations about euthanasia for them.

With bipedal family members the experience must be different. Sentience in the human makes the difference, and so we defer to the one who will die to make the decision? But what if they can’t? Or leave it too late?

2023-07-30

Life and Death

23.13 The Question of Suicide, revisited

Beyond the gift of god argument, attitudes to suicide may vary with cultural norms. In some cultures it seen as the ultimate in cowardice, and selfishness. In others, suicide is seen as the failure of society to rescue the suicidal individual from the social and psychological demons she or he is living with. In yet other societies it is seen as the height of honour. But mostly, suicide has been seen as a tragic end to an unhappy existence, and an outcome that society should do whatever it can to minimize.

2023-07-15

Life and Death

23.12 Mortality and Immortality

I found exploring cemeteries profoundly thought-provoking. Marlene found it mildly morbid. I understand her point of view, even though I doubt she understood mine.

2023-06-29

Life and Death

23.11: Turning Into My Dad

Ageing happens every day of course but we don’t tend to notice, until one day. Somewhere around age 70 I began to notice changes in Dad’s skin, brown spots on his hands, and face. And jowls. Clear signs of ageing. And it bothered me.

His skin also became increasingly wrinkled. He’d take off his perma-pressed shirt and remark his skin needed ironing. Miraculously his hair never went gray!

2023-06-15

Life and Death

22-15. My Favourite Cousin

As our lives diverged, contact was reduced to the banality of weddings and funerals, and the shallow wish that ‘we must try to get together more often’, and not just at funerals. It’s a common story I think, but one that brings with it some regret.

2022-08-15

Grief

21-11. On Certainty

It’s amazing how we put off doing what we know we must, somehow hoping to buy time and maybe a miracle. It’s certain we have to do our taxes. (Though maybe not for everyone – I’ve heard of people who avoided filing tax returns for years, maybe even know some of them, and I’m pretty sure it’s not because they have no taxable income.) It seems just as certain we have to accept our own demise too (though maybe those serial avoiders also know something about certain death the rest of us don’t).

2021-06-15

20-1.1 Pavane Pour Une Infante Défunte

I know I said I would only issue a new edition of Travels With Myself II twice a month. But some stories can’t wait two

2020-06-18

20-1. My Story Isn’t Over Yet, June 15

Many of my readers, when they had read the last instalments of my blogs that they were in fact the last, were mildly alarmed at the news: I had said I would convert the two blogs to books: The Pilipiñas Packet ended because I had returned to Canada from Philippines, Travels with Myself ended because my journey from the abyss to recovery had largely been complete. But then my caring readers were relieved when I said I would continue the blog, I still have a life to live and stories yet to tell.

2020-06-15

TWM – 53. Grief’s Lessons

[two things that have stayed with me] : ‘we never stop grieving, it just gets quieter.’ And, ‘[he] doesn’t believe in closure’. If there’s new information that explain things you didn’t understand before, that helps; but there is no closure. It’s not like closing the lid of a box, or a coffin.

2020-01-30

TWM – 25. Reflections on the Fog – Aging, Empathy and Grief

And I already ‘knew’ about Grief, Empathy and Aging. But I didn’t really ‘know’. You cannot know these things until you have actually experienced the depth of feeling these can demand of you. But my year in the Fog brought whole new lessons.

2019-09-17

TWM – 11. The Race to the End

In the ensuing weeks my daily routine was almost entirely focused on the care and comforting of Marlene. I designed an excel spreadsheet to monitor

2019-07-25

Travels with Myself

A Journal of Discovery and Transition
Doug Jordan, Author

23.19 Legacy Files

23.14 MAiD

23.13 The Question of Suicide, revisited

23.12 Mortality and Immortality

23.11: Turning Into My Dad

22-15. My Favourite Cousin

21-11. On Certainty

20-1.1 Pavane Pour Une Infante Défunte

20-1. My Story Isn’t Over Yet, June 15

TWM – 53. Grief’s Lessons

TWM – 25. Reflections on the Fog – Aging, Empathy and Grief

TWM – 11. The Race to the End

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Travels with Myself

A Journal of Discovery and Transition Doug Jordan, Author

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A Journal of Discovery and Transition
Doug Jordan, Author